A general term used for a person having multiple spouses is polygamy. Specifically, when a man has more than one wife it is called polygyny and a woman having more than one husband is polyandry.
Allah (swt) talks about polygyny in Surah An-Nisa 4:3: “And if you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry those that please you of [other] women, two or three or four. But if you fear that you will not be just, then [marry only] one or those your right hand possesses. That is more suitable that you may not incline [to injustice].”
To justify having more than one wife at a time we often hear men quote only a part of this Ayah: “…marry those that please you of women, two, or three or four…” Seldom do we realise that it is a disservice to the Quran when we quote it without keeping the context in mind.
Context of the Ayah
This particular Ayah was revealed at a time when having more than one wife was a predominant practice in pre-Islamic Arabia. To fully comprehend the meaning of this phrase under discussion, we need to see what came before and after. Let us delve into the first part of the Ayah: “And if you fear that you will not deal justly with the orphan girls, then marry those that please you of [other] women, two or three or four.”
It is evident that the original context was to uphold the rights of the orphan girls, who can be at a risk of abuse by their male guardians. When Urwah bin Zubair (rtam) asked his aunt Aisha (rtaf) concerning this Ayah she replied: “O my nephew, this Ayah refers to those orphaned girls whose inheritance from their fathers are mixed with the wealth of their guardians.” She said: “It was the custom of the Arabs who had under their custody beautiful and rich orphan girls to marry them without offering them their fair dowry.”
We see that the Ayah prevents men from taking advantage of orphan girls under their care, by instructing them to give the girls their proper dowry, and if they cannot do so, then simply leave them alone and marry elsewhere.
The Ayah also upholds the rights of women by permitting men to marry a maximum of four women at one time, as against having limitless number of wives being the norm before the revelation of this Ayah. This permission is bound with the condition that the man will be just to all of his wives, as the second part of the Ayah states: “But if you fear that you will not be just, then [marry only] one…”
The Prophet (sa) said: “The person who has two wives, but is not just between them, shall appear on the Day of Judgement in such a condition that one half of his body will be collapsing.” (Tirmidhi)
The word used here is ‘Adl’ (just). Adl contains two basic meanings: a) to establish balance and proportion; b) to give others their right indiscriminately.
It is a clear instruction from Allah (swt) that if you feel you will not be able to do justice between your wives, then marry one only. The husband must treat each of his wives with justice and must not cause harm to any of his wives, physically or emotionally. The Prophet (sa) prohibited Ali (rtam) from marrying a second wife, while his daughter Fatimah (rtaf) was still alive, because of the emotional harm it might do to her.
Imam Bukhari recorded that the Messenger of Allah (sa) said upon the pulpit: “Verily, the sons of Hisham ibn Al-Mughirah have sought my permission to marry their daughters to Ali ibn Abi Talib (rtam). I do not give permission, again I do not give permission, and again I do not give permission, unless Ali ibn Abi Talib (rtam) intends to divorce my daughter and marry their daughters. Verily, she is only a part of me. I am upset by what upsets her, and I am harmed by what harms her.”
Making it a general announcement, he made it clear that men should not marry a second wife, if it harms the first wife. And it was seen that Ali (rtam) did not take another wife during the lifetime of Fatima (rtaf).
Apart from the emotional aspect, the husband must have ample financial resources to support each wife and his offspring with equity. Muslim scholars have set strict guidelines regarding equality in the amount of time spent with each wife and the maintenance of each with respect to food, clothing, shelter and other necessities of life.
In the same Surah, Allah (swt) reiterates that it is impossible for a man to do justice to two or more wives. He says in Surah al-Nisa 4:129: “You will never be able to be just between your wives, even if it is your ardent desire. Do not incline to one of them and leave the other neglected. If you are righteous and fear Allah, then Allah is ever Forgiving and Merciful.”
Scholars deduced from these two Ayaat that it is recommended (Mustahab) for a man to marry only one woman at a time. Imam Nawawi writes: “It is forbidden to marry more than four wives and it is recommended to be limited to one wife out of fear of wronging them or failing to be just.” (Al-Majmoo Sharh Al-Muhadhab 16/144)
Often the Prophet (sa) is criticised by non-Muslims for having multiple wives, though that was the norm at that time. However, the critics forget that for twenty-five years of his life, he had just one wife – Khadijah (rtaf). It was only after she passed way that he took more wives, and that too had wisdom behind it, such as strengthening bonds between tribes, care for the widows, and passing forward the teachings of the Deen through them.
Ash-Sharbeeni writes, “It is the Sunnah not to marry more than one wife without an obvious need.” (Mughni al-Muhtaj 4/207)
Wisdom Behind Polygyny
There is always depth and wisdom in the injunctions of our Deen. Islam is a way of life and its rulings are such that they cater to all times and places. Polygyny is permissible with conditions. It is not a privilege, but rather a responsibility upon man for which he shall be answerable to his Rabb.
Some of the objectives and the wisdom behind this Ayah:
- It ensures fairness and protection for women.
- Women find security when they are widowed. Their needs as well as their children’s basic needs are met.
- It is a means of safeguarding from Zina.
There are certain social, psychological, and financial benefits in polygyny. In many regions of the world, such as parts of Africa, polygyny is the norm, due to socio-economic reasons. According to an infographic shared by Yaqeen Institute, predominantly Christian nations practice polygamy at significantly higher rates than the predominantly Muslim countries. Despite all the negative images, there are women, who are happy within such a marriage. Some women say that they get to enjoy their “free time”, when the husband is with the other family. Maryam Jameelah (a US convert and author of a number of books) is known to have chosen to be a second wife, so that she would be able to continue to study and write.
The co-wives should not be forced to live together. A co-wife writing in “Islamic Sisters International” describes that apart from their husband, she and his other wife have nothing in common – their interests, tastes, and personalities are so different that it is better for all concerned that they keep a certain distance from one another.
Stipulate Conditions in the Marriage Contract
In Islam, a wife has the right to stipulate conditions in the marriage contract. It is lawful for women and their guardians to stipulate a condition in the marriage contract that the husband may not marry a second wife against her will. If he does so, either in public or secret, she has the right to divorce him.
Ibn Taymiyah writes,
“When he accepts the condition in the marriage contract that he will not marry another wife against her will, if he marries another wife, the matter is in her hands. This condition is valid and required in the school of Malik, Ahmad, and others. Whenever he marries another wife against her will, the matter is in her hands. If she wishes, she can accept it, and if she wishes, she may separate from him. Allah (swt) knows best.” (Majmoo Al-Fatawa 32/170)
In the school of Imam Abu Hanifah, Ash-Shafi and others, such a contract of marriage is valid, but the accompanying conditions are void. And Allah knows best.
Law in Pakistan
There are instances where a man contracts a secret second marriage in another city or country, without the knowledge of his first wife and children. This is a sheer violation of Islamic teachings. An unannounced Nikah is invalid. A person who keeps his marriage a secret is sinful in the sight of Allah. Such a marriage can be emotionally stressful to both the parties and can be complicating when children are born out of the secret marriage and claims to inheritance are made upon the demise of the father.
Under the Muslim Family Laws Ordinance, 1961, if a man contracts a second marriage without permission from his first wife, he shall be liable to:
(a) pay immediately the entire amount of the dowry, whether prompt or deferred; and
(b) be punishable with imprisonment, as well as a fine.
Dr. Qibla Ayaz, chairman of Pakistan’s Council of Islamic Ideology (CII), stated that this law contradicts the Shariah law. He explained that even if someone gets married without the first wife’s permission and is punished according to the law of the land, his Nikah will remain valid.
To conclude, Islam permits polygyny under strict conditions. Polygyny is only permissible, if a man is just to all of his wives and does not harm any of them physically or financially, and is not emotionally abusive to any of them. It is a responsibility upon the man and it is recommended in Islam that he marries only one woman at a time.
Abu Huraira (rtaf) reported: The Messenger of Allah (sa) said: “The most complete of the believers in faith are those with the most excellent character, and the best of you are the best in behaviour to their women.” (Tirmidhi)
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