By
Rana Rais Khan – Founder and Editor-in-Chief Hiba Family Resource Centre
Ibrahim At Tawejri, an Arab scholar has beautifully explained the misunderstood idea of Haya. Generally, Haya is loosely translated as modesty or shamefulness, which is a very superficial definition.
Haya is a driving force for goodness. It encourages us to obey the Creator’s (swt) commands and do Ihsan with His creation even if not ordered. It is to mindfully feel Allah’s (swt) watch over us that keeps us in check. Haya is a beautiful habit and character trait that stands in contrast to ugly behaviour and repulsive characteristics. A person forsakes an ugly character to embrace the beauty of Haya by choosing the right speech, thoughts, attitude, dress code, lifestyle, etc. only for Allah (swt).
When a believer carries utmost reverence and love for Allah (swt), he/she demonstrates Haya. But if this element of Iman Billah is missing in a person, he fakes a pretentious modest behaviour to impress people. But this veneer keeps cracking up when the person is tested, exposing him to others.
Allah (swt) states in the Quran: “No! [But] indeed man transgresses. Because he sees himself self-sufficient. Indeed, to your Lord is the return. Have you seen the one who forbids? A servant when he prays? Have you seen if he is upon guidance or enjoins righteousness? Have you seen if he denies and turns away – Does he not know that Allah sees?” (Al Alaq 96:6-14)
It is indeed a reality that Allah (swt) is the only One, Who is constantly observing us as a result of which we feel Haya regarding our conduct. Haya is Islam’s superior signature trait and noble quality of the heart.
On another occasion Allah (swt) commands: “O mankind, fear your Lord, Who created you from one soul and created from it its mate and dispersed from both of them many men and women. And fear Allah through whom you ask one another and the wombs. Indeed Allah is ever over you an Observer.” (An Nisa 4:1)
In the above verse, we understand that the reform of our familial relationships is based on our realization that Allah (swt) is watching us. Otherwise we tend to concoct stories and false narratives about our own innocence and victimization at the hands of our loved ones and find an escape.
But to Allah (swt) is our return, Who has a record by the second. This develops Taqwa in us to choose the right response and enables us to deliver other’s rights first and always as a principle. We trust and ask Allah (swt) for our own rights. Recognition of Allah (swt) is a great motivating factor in keeping our relations of the womb straight. This can only stem from Haya.
Prophet Muhmmad’s (sa) Haya
Abu Hurairah (rta) narrated that Prophet Muhammad (sa) stated: “Faith has seventy odd branches, the most virtuous of this is La ilaha illal Allah (there is none worthy of worship except Allah) and the least of which is removing something harmful from the road. And modesty (Al Haya) is a branch of faith.” (An Nasai)
Presence of Haya in a person indicates that he/she is a Momin, a believer with faith. It is high in virtue and only brings benefits to the believer and to others through him.
Imran bin Hussain (rta) reported that the Prophet (sa) said:”Haya does not bring anything except good.” (Bukhari and Muslim)
Prophet Muhammad (sa) was known to possess an incredible level of Haya. Abu Said (rta) said that: “The Prophet (sa) was more shy (from Haya and pious from committing religious indiscretions) than a veiled virgin girl.” (Bukhari)
When he witnessed something indecent or inappropriate the colour of his face changed. He did not utter anything from his tongue or make loud gestures of dislike.
If our heart is spiritually strong and alive it is a home for Haya. But a spiritually dead heart or soul has flickering Haya that is weak and feeble. Shiatan puts a sense of indifference into a believer that removes his Haya.
Allah (swt) appreciates this quality in a Momin so much that if the Momin displays Haya from Allah (swt) while obeying Him, Allah (swt) also does Haya from him when the believer falls into sin. Allah (swt) doesn’t want anything to defile or tarnish a believer’s status. He wants the believer to restore his Iman quickly by repenting and reforming.
Except for animals, Allah (swt) granted the beauty of Haya to all mankind. Animals lack this sensitivity or consciousness in them. Hence Haya becomes a force for humans to accelerate in virtuous behaviour and mannerisms. We know that we had such Sahabah such as Usman (rta) whom angels showed Haya to because of his own exemplary modesty.
What will happen if Haya is removed from our life?
Here’s a checklist to measure against our own personal reform. If Haya departs from our life…
- We will not honour our guests
- Promises will be broken
- People will mistrust each other
- Nobody will be helped for any need
- Flaws and sins of others will not be concealed
- Tangible beauty of the face, body and clothes will be appreciated only
- Inner real beauty of virtuous thoughts, actions and speech will be considered worthless
- People will openly indulge in immodesty and flaunt it
- Being characterless, rough, indecent and bold will be termed as cool
- To think inferior or bad about others will become common
- Majority of the society will not fulfill each other’s rights
- The young will not respect the elderly
- The elders will not be exemplary role models
- Decent and beautiful mannerisms displaying mercy and courtesy will depart
- People will demonstrate inhuman behaviour in all aspects of life towards every other individual
Do you think that you and I live in a society that mirrors this reflection? If that is the case, the remedy is to instill Haya for Allah (swt) and back track to the original state of the heart. And this revolution begins with us as the forerunners!
Try pinning up this list somewhere you can see daily. Make Dua and an action plan for yourself to improve in each area for Allah’s (swt) love only. If you fail, don’t give up. Bounce back! Until Shiatan gives up on you!
Though Haya is pre-dominantly attached to Islam, Alhumdulillah, it is a universal characteristic and timeless quality that can heal the world too with its beauty and strength.
Partially adapted from a course taught by Safiya Khan – ‘A Path to Spiritual Awakening’
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